Relative Something

*this* John W. Hays' take on things and experiences

Scared Chicks

with 6 comments

While Cyndie is away at the lake, I am filling in for her as “chick mom” when I get home from work each day. I think they had me figured out the first moment I stepped into the role. I can see it in their faces.

“You’re not doing it right!”

“Mom always cuts the crust off.”

“We don’t strip down to our underwear for naps.”

I’m definitely the dad in this relationship. They have a heat lamp and some water. They’ll be just fine.

While staring at them romping around like a bunch of 3-week-old chicks for a while the other night, I mindlessly belched a frog-voiced burp. I scared the daylights out of them!

Never saw twelve chicks move so fast all at once like that before.

In a blink, the scattered puff-balls instantly became one tiny pile of little heads squeezed into the smallest possible space at the other end of the brooder, frozen in a motionless defense move that looked like an attempt to appear invisible while maintaining absolute silence.

We both held our positions until I broke the spell by speaking to them in my best falsetto “dad-charming-chickens” voice to let them know it was just me and everyone was safe. As quick as they froze together, they went back to fluttering about as normal.

“Say ‘excuse me’ Dad.”

Excuse me.

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Written by johnwhays

August 5, 2020 at 6:00 am

6 Responses

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  1. This is one of the funny great works of chicken love i have ever read. Good going DAD to Chicks!!!!

    Mom Marie

    August 5, 2020 at 3:16 pm

    • Thank you! I’ve learned (and borrow) from some great storytellers…

      johnwhays

      August 5, 2020 at 7:17 pm

  2. Hahahahaha!!

    Sara Friswold

    August 5, 2020 at 9:23 am

  3. I read this aloud to Larry and got the first full-out laugh I’ve heard from him in days. Thank you, cuz! 😘

    katykatrinka

    August 5, 2020 at 8:13 am


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