Relative Something

*this* John W. Hays' take on things and experiences

Can’t Breathe

with 4 comments

Anger boiling over in the form of roiling balls of flame with no visible public servants on hand to contain the rage as daytime turns into night makes for a disturbing meditation in the moments before nodding off to sleep.

It is hard to breathe through our masks.

It is hard to breathe through the smoke.

It is hard to breathe when being choked.

It is hard to contend with the fact that all I was going to do was breathe in our forest air yesterday and beam love to the world, yet the Pentagon needed to put military police on alert as protesters ignored curfew orders and ignited numerous new fires.

Morning turns the tide and reasonable people emerge with brooms and trash bags to pick up debris in an attempt to hasten the healing of the damage done overnight.

It’s an interesting dynamic to watch the venting of angst built up over multiple generations and centuries of time followed by the immediate effort to clean up the present damage which will actually require generations of repair to remedy.

How many years of treating people of color (and women and LGBTQ and homeless and impoverished and mentally impaired human beings) with equal respect to their white counterparts will be needed to complete healing that is the dream of healthy well-meaning communities of enlightened citizens of the world?

I’m not sure I can breathe that long.



Written by johnwhays

May 30, 2020 at 8:42 am

4 Responses

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  1. Thanks, John. We had brief reprieve this afternoon with the successful launch of Space X with Doug and Bob headed off on their grand adventure. Then an almost immediate return to the disturbances in the streets. The moments today before launch had the same tension and excitement from when I was a kid and the first space flights we happening. Those times had violence and tension as well. I have been thinking the explosion of emotions that is happening is partially due to people being more confined than normal. May peace be with you.

    • Thank you, Jim. The launch brought tears to my eyes for the immensity of accomplishment and display of achievement. Such a contrast to the anarchistic mindset of the riotous throngs trying to use the police murder of a black man as their excuse to wreak havoc. Actually dilutes the message of those who seek to improve equal treatment for people of color.


      May 31, 2020 at 6:00 am

  2. That’s a beautifully expressed meditation, John. I, too, have been asking how I can show solidarity with oppressed, feel compassion for all who are in pain (whether I agree with them or not), and work toward good in this world. It’s a tough one. I pray for guidance and loving intention.


    May 30, 2020 at 12:03 pm

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