Relative Something

*this* John W. Hays’ take on things and experiences

Posts Tagged ‘reality

Touch

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I missed it
when some sort of chance
snuck past
silently
snow flakes falling
fearlessly
without even knowing
I reached out
through everything
that was nothing
hoping to touch
a mystery
to feel what it’s like
a perfect reality
that laughs
and loves
while I was thinking
simply
in a moment
I should have been
feeling

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Written by johnwhays

November 12, 2017 at 10:50 am

Dream World

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Last night, I dreamed about discovering a submarine that demanded investigation. I and two unidentified persons ran a camera-like device around the perimeter in search of information. We pushed it as far as possible around one direction, and then switched around from the other direction.

There we found a window port, and I thought to grab a flashlight that Cyndie and I keep on the end of one counter in our kitchen. Dreams can be so convenient that way.

DSCN4723e2I shined the light into the submarine, and though seeing only emptiness similar to a sea bottom, which coincidentally looked a lot like the bottom of our landscape pond where I was mucking about last night to clean the input filter on the pump —no fish remains detected— my light beam got the attention of an occupant. A man approached the window.

He said his name was Bob. I identified myself and our party. For the life of me, I can’t recall the names I gave him for the two unidentified characters with me. I feel like one of them was Cyndie, but I’m pretty sure I didn’t name her as such.

I told Bob that it was 2016 and he said he was from 2066.

Later in the dream, because I have already lost some of the detail in my awakened state, this most memorable situation occurred. Bob taught me how to move through matter. We were against a solid wall, kneeling, I believe. He was describing how it wasn’t actually solid and there is space between atoms, as he moved his hands and head through the wall.

I held up my hands with fingers outstretched and moved them toward the wall. They broke the surface like it was water, with only a slightly increased resistance. As they moved into it, I pressed my head through, where I could then see Bob’s hands and head protruding beside me.

I remember feeling a wave of sensation washing through my whole body as I breached the wall.

This morning, I’m more inclined to feel the “wall” was the barrier between awake and asleep. I love that I was able to reach into my awake reality of our kitchen to get the flashlight to help in my asleep world beside a submarine deep under water.

Feel free to psycho-analyze this, but realize that I am the only one who can understand what this means to me. Right now, I am enjoying how easily I was accepting the possibility that a person from 50 years in the future was talking with me and teaching me how to do something supernatural.

And that I was a successful student.

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Written by johnwhays

May 13, 2016 at 7:43 am

Reality Check

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I am going to pause today in my ongoing chronicle of our Guatemalan adventure to provide some perspective that I think will show why I choose to describe our 10 days with the Morales family in such specific day-to-day detail. This is the April reality that we have returned to at our home, latitude 44.7739° N:

IMG_iP0774eYou may be able to barely make out the silhouette of our horses in the distance through the falling flakes, but you won’t find any palm trees and I can attest that there was absolutely nothing similar to a balmy Pacific breeze.

IMG_iP0777eDo you blame me for wanting to relive every precious warm moment of that visit with our great friends in their beautiful country? It’s winter-cold here again and the wind is gusting mini-blizzards straight out of the Arctic circle this week!

Seriously, tomorrow I am going right back to describing our last days at the beach house and then our return to Guatemala City in preparation of boarding the flight home. Maybe it’s escapism. I’m not proud. I do it because I can.

Aw, heck. I can’t even wait.

This is what I am talking about…

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Written by johnwhays

April 22, 2015 at 6:00 am

Reality Shoes

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There is a challenge with being a positive person. It’s called, reality. Reality has two feet. Sometimes two left feet. Reality is the reason for the phrase, “waiting for the other shoe to drop.” The other shoe always does.

Now, if a positive person were somehow able to wield enough favorable influence over outcomes, the dropping of that other shoe of reality might always be a really great thing. In my experience, the world doesn’t work that way, so all an optimist can do is choose a way to find some good in whatever shows up when that other shoe lands.

The battle might be seen as a tug of war between the Pollyanna principle and depressive realism. As a former depressive living ‘in recovery’ —with optimism being my sobriety— I find myself needing to overcome an unconscious tendency to grab hold of gloomy reality when it steps into my life. I will grasp it a bit too tightly, which allows it to lead my astray, pulling me away from the fresh air of the glad game that I have been breathing.

DSCN2714eYesterday, while walking Delilah through the drainage ditch beside our fields, we found the horses grazing up on a high spot, exposed to the wind. It surprised me, because it wasn’t a particularly warm breeze, but there they were. We were moving slowly, as I allowed Delilah to ravenously explore to her heart’s desire. The horses showed interest in our arrival.

As we slowly made our way along the ditch, they followed at an unhurried pace, closing the distance to the fence. It’s not always clear whether one horse in particular is setting their course, or they all share the same interest when they move like this. I wanted to respond to their approach by doing the same, but the electric fence was on, so I didn’t.

Eventually, Delilah and I reached the end of the ditch by the road, where there is a gate. I leaned on the gate and paused. Hunter had traveled the farthest along with us, but it was Cayenne who then approached me at the fence. We shared a magical few minutes of intimacy there, sharing breath and mystical energy.

I don’t know why.

When Cyndie got home, late, after a hard day, at the end of her hard week, I got a dose of reality. I grabbed it tight. It woke me early in the darkness of hours that are best spent sleeping. I followed it as it led me where I know I don’t want to go. Then I thought of that experience with Cayenne.

It was real.

The other stuff, not so much.

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Reality

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one never knows
how close or far
reality lies
away from here
but that sound it makes
when crashing down
is way too familiar
a thing to hear
and it resonates
both far and near
and brings to mind
a most basic fear
about fundamental truths
we once held dear
which only now come around
every occasional odd year

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Written by johnwhays

December 5, 2014 at 7:00 am

Posted in Creative Writing

Tagged with , ,