Relative Something

It seems a shame that I should need to muster the resources to be grateful. It ought to just rise up over me to overflowing for all that I have. I should be thankful to be gainfully employed, and to have the chance to work extra hours, when others can’t even find a job. But I don’t want to be at work on Saturday morning. I don’t want to work so many hours in a day that I never see daylight and by the time I get home, it is after my dinner hour and I don’t want to eat. I arrive home so exhausted that I just want to lay down and sleep. Then I get up early the next morning to hustle back into the workplace. It feels like I just left, and I’m back for more.

We are experiencing a boom in business. I should be grateful.

I do appreciate the opportunity, to a certain degree, to rise to the challenge and give the extra effort and energy in response to the bounty of orders placed with our company. It reflects a confidence our customers have in us. We are proud to respond rapidly to the demands made on us and to provide the short turn-around sought by both our loyal businesses and the newer companies that hold potential for becoming regulars. Too bad that all of a sudden, everyone is wanting our services at the very same, short time.

There is a small level of adrenaline in response to the heavy pace of business and all the challenges that come with it, and it can be exciting. But in my case, it comes at the expense of other aspects of my life that I value more highly. I just don’t have the reserves to accomplish the tasks and passions of my non-work related life. So at this time of year when non-work life activity is peaking, this year I am finding my work load at the day job is also at a peak. At least, we think it is a peak. There has been no indication when and if it might let up. Very soon we will be faced with making a decision as to whether we are being forced to grow the company, or not.

I should be grateful.

Is there a difference between feeling grateful and being grateful?