Posts Tagged ‘planning’
Mission Creep
It shouldn’t come as a surprise, but our simple project to install fences on our property, in preparation for safely securing horses (in case we should ever get any horses), has grown well beyond the scope of our original intentions. Planning and budgeting doesn’t really factor into dreams and inspirations as well as we need it to. Now we are in the midst of a water management project, that was triggered when trying to finish the front fence, and it became obvious that we could benefit from a gate in the front corner, but the access from the township road was on the other side of a drainage ditch. How are we going to pay for this? Creatively.
My favorite camera returned from the Canon service department yesterday afternoon, so I took some pictures of the new culvert being installed, to test the camera out.
More Fence
Yesterday, our fence crew pounded the last posts for the paddocks, and put up a lot of boards. After boards, they will mount one line of wire along the top, which will be able to be electrified. This will discourage horses from chewing on the wood of the fence. Next, they will attach gates, and then complete the installation of the automatic waterer, and we will be out of excuses for not having horses here.
I guess it is time to take care of all the little details we have neglected to worry about until after the fact.
This afternoon, Cyndie is expecting a visit from a person with the local extension service who will review our situation and offer advice on best practices and available resources to support our efforts here. It’s another step in our effort to learn more about what we have gotten ourselves into, even as we forge ahead with plans to establish the infrastructure from which we will operate.
We have stumbled here and there, seeming to get ahead of ourselves sometimes, while allowing a few important details to fade into the background, but the progress we make is part of the way Cyndie works. It gets us moving toward our goal, and forces us to learn on the fly. It creates a bit of mental stress for me, but I can accept it, because if it were up to me, I think we’d be stuck before we even started.
I’d be hung up trying to answer the practically unanswerable questions, trying so hard to avoid a misstep that I’d end up not taking any at all.
Here’s to Cyndie’s brilliant capacity to bring our dreams to life, and our amazing progress thus far!
Frustrating Lessons
I’m sorry, but I need to vent some frustration. I’ve taken on the project of building a woodshed, guided by a rudimentary plan I found on the internet, using mostly found materials, my meager collection of construction tools, and my distinct lack of experience with carpentry. One of the draws for me to undertake this effort on my own was the encouragement I read online at the site where I found the building plan, pointing out that a shed like this makes a great first attempt at constructing a building, because there are no codes to meet. Anything goes.
And what’s the worst that could happen if the shed fails? The stack of split firewood might topple over or get wet temporarily. It’s a pretty low-risk construction project.
What I am finding is, it has a high risk of causing me great frustration. Have I mentioned that I tend toward perfectionism on just this kind of task? I gotta admit, that very tendency toward perfectionism is a significant contributor to my lack of experience in doing something like building a shed out of found materials. I know in advance it is doomed from the start. Why would I choose to put myself through the exasperation?
Of course, Cyndie points out that this kind of thinking is my first problem.
I can’t argue that. I’m my own worst enemy when it comes to thinking like “the little engine that could.” It is hard to meditate on the “I think I can” mantra, when you already embody the notion that you “can’t.”
I didn’t just dive into this project willy-nilly. I hemmed and hawed over it. I trolled for friends with skills to do it for me. I let the idea of doing it myself stew for weeks, hoping time would either reveal another solution, or I’d magically become skilled by just thinking about it a lot. I thought about the materials the project would require, over and over, trying to determine the likelihood I could come up with everything I would need.
Here comes one of my first frustrations: It is only a simple woodshed. Why does my mind make it seem so complicated?
Eventually, I committed and began gathering materials. That phase took additional weeks for me to accomplish, between familiarizing myself with shopping lumber yards and making a decision on what to use.
Now, as I’ve already written about here, I have the frame up, and as you can see, the rafters in place. (Thanks are due to my friend, architect Mike Wilkus, for teaching me how to mount the rafters to a log beam… cut a “bird’s-mouth” notch in the rafter!) After the exercise of this phase, my perfectionistic traits are irritated like a raw-rubbed blister.
I know that it is in my best interest to consider things like keeping it level and square. I would love to be able to do that. As a novice, I am struggling because the only straight line I have is a piece of tightened string, and my level. The log posts and beams are imperfect. The flat rocks I picked are imperfect. The lumber I have is all warped and twisted. I rarely have been able to reference anything trustworthy.
It hardly matters to the overall structure, but it matters to me, because I notice where it is off. Drives me nuts.
I don’t like hammering nails. They go most of the way in, then stop and bend. They go all the way in, and the head breaks off. They split the wood. They somehow repel my hammer and make me leave dents in the wood, all around the nail. Just when I think I’m getting the hang of it, my hand and arm get fatigued and the nails start bending again, and the wood gets more dents in it.
I prefer screws. My screws also can split the wood. The heads strip. The screwdriver bit strips. The screw goes 90% of the way in and then seizes. Finally, the head breaks off.
Both nails and screws jump out of my hands. They fly out of the wood as I’m starting. I drop the drill-driver from the ladder. I can’t reach from where the ladder is. I don’t have scaffolding, so I am up and down that ladder an uncountable number of times. I move it back and forth, bumping the beams overhead, knocking the rafters out of place.
Can I complain about the bugs? They aren’t unique to a carpentry project, but they have been adding to my frustration in this case.
The woodshed may be a good first structure to build, but I’m thinking I should be building a boat. I found myself cursing like a sailor at the frustrations over the weekend.
Cyndie is sweet to point out, regardless my frustrations, we’ve got the majority of the project accomplished, and I have to admit, I am pleased to be getting the shed I have all along envisioned for this spot. I think it will be perfect, even if it isn’t “perfect.”
Frame’s Up
The holiday celebration last weekend put my wood shed project on hold, and I have been hoping to reclaim some momentum ever since. I was thinking I could get back to it, right after we got home from the lake, but other tasks won out. The cross-beams, with posts attached, were left lying on the ground for almost two weeks while I contemplated how we would stand them upright to get them assembled, with a limited number of helping hands.
The old treated fence posts we chose to use are very heavy, and tied together, I figured it might be a problem to lift and hold in position. One solution we were considering was to use the bucket on the diesel tractor. I imagined we could strap them up to be held in position with the bucket. However, with just the two of us, I would be up on the tractor, and that would leave Cyndie alone to guide the heavy posts. For that reason, I allowed some days to pass, while I thought the plan through some more.
Yesterday, when I got home from the day-job, Cyndie offered to help me figure out if we could get it done. I began gathering tools and things, in preparation for the attempt… Of course, I would eventually need the ladder out there. As I was carrying it toward the site, it struck me that we could just lean the first set of posts against the ladder when we got them upright, if we were able to lift them with just the two of us.
Sure enough, we lifted it. Cyndie and I proceeded to manage the whole process with just the two of us, a ladder, and no tractor.
Sometimes the solution is so easy, you overlook it, until it eventually become so obvious, you can’t miss. Maybe, as I do more and more projects like this, the obvious solutions will get easier to recognize, and appear to me sooner.
Next step: rafters…
Home Again
photo by Elysa Hays
We made an early exit from the balloon toss competition this year. Elysa snapped this photo, in which I am holding up the remnants of our water balloon. Cyndie made a perfectly good throw, but I messed up the catch. Somebody immediately hollered that it was a classic example of farmer’s hands, since I didn’t execute the soft catch required.
We endured some long traffic backups on the drive home yesterday, due to the heavy volume of holiday traffic. I plan to do some exploring in the future, for the possibility of using back roads to avoid the areas where a turn causes a log jam of vehicles to accumulate.
Our cats didn’t seem to hold a grudge against us for having left them alone, and immediately sought as much hands-on attention as we were willing to give. It appears we won’t have to worry about leaving them alone for a weekend.
We decided to give our attention to the labyrinth for the rest of the day. I used our old reel mower to cut the turf at the lowest setting, while Cyndie did some weed pulling and trimmed the long grass around the perimeter. Then I measured and marked the last of the areas where Cyndie wants to do some planting, along the axis where the entrance is located.
The essential steps that remain after that are, laying markers to establish all the lanes, and putting down some gravel or wood chips on the path. Optionally, we are still considering planting a tree near the middle, and we are hoping to do a bit more work dressing up the grounds immediately surrounding the labyrinth. Cyndie would like to make a bench out of found natural materials, to be located near the entrance, allowing for a moment of pause before embarking on the journey.
Something tells me there will be a permanent urge to continue to refine and enhance the whole thing. It will likely always be a growing and changing space, which will be a reflection of our growth and change with the passing of time.
Experiential Learning
I admit it, I have never done anything like trying to build a shed on my own. I’ve wanted a wood shed since we arrived last October, but with no experience, it took me all this time to get over the hurdle of just deciding to try.
In a search for what I wanted for a wood shed, I quickly and easily came upon images of styles that appealed to me. One of the sites even had a rudimentary sketch of a plan to build a simple version for low-cost, if you scrounge materials from what is available to you.
I decided to use the old fence posts that we have from the original fencing that we had removed last fall. Other pieces slowly seemed to appear and fill out my list of needs. The key piece I wanted to have was roof material that would be translucent, like corrugated panels I have seen on other roofs of this type of structure. I was finding that to be a difficult thing to scrounge. I didn’t do a lot of aggressive searching, which left me hoping something would just magically appear out of nowhere.
When that didn’t happen, I started to research what was available for purchase from building supply retailers. The first large entity I shopped at didn’t stock anything of the type, but one friendly customer service person spent time searching their records for something that would work. He came up with an option that wasn’t quite right, and would cost 10-times what I was interested in spending.
I find it funny how quickly after that, I fell into a mode of thinking this wouldn’t be the way to go. Then I got around to visiting the next building supply retailer in the region, just in case I was giving up too soon, and to my surprise, there in front of my eyes was the exact product I envisioned, stocked on the sales floor, and at an acceptable price. My hope was restored!
That left one last crucial step. I needed to commit to the location. It was a tough decision, but in the short time since clearing the ground at that spot, I have grown very happy with that choice.
There was nothing left to stop me from getting on with the cutting and hammering. I spent the weekend toiling away, trying to figure out what the essential steps were that need consideration, and then in what order it all needed to take place. I had a dream of being able to start and finish it all in a short span of days. By Sunday night, my accomplishments were: the ground was leveled, footings were located and leveled, and the vertical posts were attached to the horizontal beams, ready to be erected.
It’s not bad progress, for a first-ever attempt, but I had higher hopes. Things take the time they take, and I want to remember to be present and appreciate the variety of interruptions that inevitably pop up, even when they delay the project.
The delays actually provide a chance for earlier lessons to sink in, and time to consult with advisers on how I might choose to proceed with the next learning opportunity.
New Insight
I awoke with a song in my head. It was a Roches song, but I didn’t know which one. I let the short snippet play round and round, over and over, enjoying it thoroughly, but that still left me wanting.
It took only a few tries to locate the right song, “The Scorpion Lament,” from their album, Keep On Doing. Ahhh. It’s like scratching an itch.
While processing all that, something else was revealed to me this morning. It is probably obvious that we would have a list of things demanding attention here on our new property. – I wonder how long I get to refer to this place as ‘new’ to us. I will probably use that term through the first year, since every day is still new to us, because we have not experienced spring or summer here before.
Anyway, regarding that list, …there are a couple of things that seem to me as though Cyndie should take the lead. When I don’t hear of any results on those, I toss out a few hints, occasional reminders and eventually realize I’m simply nagging.
“Yeah, I could do that.” she accommodates me.
With regard to one particular issue, last night I finally asked her if she needed something else to happen first, as if there was some step in a sequence that hadn’t yet occurred. That is a loaded question, in a way, because she is so classically random, …like the way she mows the lawn.
I was becoming confused with her choosing not to act in cases where it seemed to me it would be something that could be quickly knocked off our to-do list, or at least trigger action that can bring subsequent progress. What was holding her up from taking this step? If she was truly random, things should be able to happen at any time.
That’s it! This morning I realized that her not doing things isn’t the result of waiting on a sequence, it is the very manifestation of her randomness. That is why it doesn’t appear to bother her that a particular step gets done by a certain time. Meanwhile, I grow uncomfortable. I want it to happen in sequence, meaning, do this now, and then other things can follow.
It is why I am bugged by the fact that we suddenly find ourselves working on one thing, when I feel like we haven’t yet finished another. I also realized that after we accomplish some of the random tasks, I don’t get the same sense of satisfaction from having done so, as Cyndie does, because I’m still framing it as having been out of sequence.
Eventually, things work out for both of us, one way or another. We are invested in learning from our styles, and in achieving more together than would be possible, each on our own. I know that I have benefited greatly, over and over, as a result of her randomness through the years.
Our success is the reward that comes from the attraction of opposites, which is accomplished by overcoming the difficulties inherent in being so different from one another!
Intermediate States
We have arrived at the U.S. holiday weekend of “Memorial Day.” For us, this usually means a trip to the vacation getaway of Cyndie’s family, in Hayward, WI, for “Work Weekend.” This is the time when the property gets a major cleaning, the beach gets raked, toys and floatation devices pulled from storage, and boats get scrubbed and hauled down to the lake. The work culminates in a spectacular community feast at the main lodge.
We aren’t there this year. It feels strange.
We have our new property to tend to this spring, and have been granted a pass from contributing our labor to the lake place.
It feels as though everything at our place is hanging in an intermediate state right now. The two biggest projects, the hay shed and paddock fencing, have been stuck in limbo for weeks, waiting for conditions to dry.
I think the geothermal furnace installation looks complete, but I don’t know the status of whether or not it is fully operational. Almost all the work of installation occurred while we weren’t home. Each day last week, I would check progress when I arrived home from the day-job, trying to discern what had been done, and why, and how. As of last night, it looks like everything is wired and plumbed, but we found no indication of the status, nor instructions on operation. They did leave manuals out. I suppose I could do some reading.
We finished digging up the drain line from the septic tank. It looks like the distribution box is disintegrating. It also looks like there are a lot of illogical twists and turns in the plumbing. I have no idea why they originally chose to do it the way they did, but it did work fine, as far as we can tell, for almost 25 years, so we won’t redo the whole thing. The septic professional I have been consulting has located a replacement distribution box, and will also replace the section of cast iron pipe originally used. It being a holiday weekend, that work will not happen until next week some time, weather permitting.
We need to do a lot of cutting of grass, as the growth is so rapid this time of year, it gets long on one end of the property before you finish cutting the other. Julian helped us greatly last weekend, by doing the first cut of the season, but he wasn’t able to mow the back hill, due to geothermal installation that was in process. It had time to grow doubly long, and we knew rain was coming, so we jumped on that chore late yesterday, before it could get any worse. I am happy to report that Cyndie was eager to have a lesson on the operation of the tractor, and then looked to be having so much fun, I might get away with doing a lot less of the grass cutting around here than I previously anticipated.
In a classic demonstration of our different modes of operation, Cyndie took off with glee, mowing around a tree and then wheeling off in any direction, haphazardly picking off areas of long grass wherever it appeared in her view. I am inclined to mow in a line, back and forth, very methodically. I am a bit more timid. She boldly devoured areas that deserved to be cut, but that I would have been hesitant to try with that mower. I was thinking it would require the brush hog attached to the large tractor. She demonstrated otherwise.
Cyndie and I are a great combination. She spotted some mushrooms growing under a dead pine tree in our front yard. I told her they tasted funny and she got all riled up, exclaiming that I shouldn’t eat them until I know what they are. I was teasing her, of course. Comparing images we found online, we are very confident that these are the very popular and definitely edible morel mushrooms.
We started tending to our little landscape pond with waterfall, but finally came to the full realization that they didn’t leave a pump behind when they moved out, so that project is awaiting a purchase. One more thing hanging in limbo. We also may try to test drive a pickup truck this weekend, a task we have been talking about accomplishing for months.
One last thing that has us feeling unsettled is how much we miss our friends, Alane, Dunia, and Marco. Cyndie has been working with Alane and Dunia for much of her Epona apprenticeship training. I met them and Marco last weekend, and in that short time, developed a deep feeling of connection with all of them. We feel a deep longing to have them here with us, and, in turn, they have indicated a desire to have us visit them in Guatemala and Australia. Long distance relationships can be hard, but we truly hope to make these connections flourish.
Our projects may hang in an intermediate state, but our friendships are definitely established.
Forget It
Yesterday was a day to forget. It would be nice if I could, but I have a tendency to hang on to the angst of things when they go awry. I like to bring order from chaos. It is one of the most rewarding aspects of my day-job. I can’t solve everything, but, if by the end of a day, I have achieved putting some things in order, I have a feeling of satisfaction for my contributions.
I didn’t have much luck doing that yesterday. I am wondering if it was somehow a carry-over of my not being able to bring order to the many projects going on at home, just at a time when I was leaving town. For sure, I was rattled by that discovery of a problem with the septic system.
In the morning, I woke over an hour before my alarm, and couldn’t get back to sleep. Of course, my mind was abuzz with preparations for my travel, needing to get ready for work, and get the house ready to be vacant for a couple of days, and to make sure to bring everything I would need for my trip. Also, there was a lot of work waiting for me on my desk at the day-job, so I went in early. I was thinking that I could use that early time to tackle one of the piles and get it processed before events of the day take over.
I never had that chance. Things unraveled early, and everything I seemed to try to get in order just became more chaotic. I had problems with my problems. Really, it was a total disaster. Maybe one of the most difficult days I’ve had, in terms of trying to bring order to chaos.
What can you do? I gave in. I let the chaos lay. I had somewhere to be. I had a deadline to be at the airport. It didn’t help that I stumbled upon a middle-of-the-afternoon traffic backup due to a stalled car. Really? Was this some kind of stress test I was being given over the last few days?
I sure hope it ends soon.
The good news for now is that I have arrived, safe and sound, at my destination, with Cyndie, in Arizona. I really have no idea what is in store for me today, at the introductory Epona workshop that Cyndie’s cadre of apprentices is giving. Maybe it will be a continuation of the stress test for me, but I don’t plan to frame it as such.
I am going to forget the day-job stress, and focus on the new adventure before me. Maybe the difficulties I have faced in the previous two days were just to put me in a place where I will get more from this weekend than I could possibly imagine. I’m going to aim to be open to whatever the lesson is for me here.
Finally Warm
Now we’re getting somewhere. The weather pattern has shifted, …finally. More importantly, no new snow has fallen for two whole days! It feels remarkable.
The first thing I did yesterday morning was, walk out to check on the water rising from the ground at the spot I discovered the day before. It had stopped flowing, but there was still a small pool of standing water there. I guess the next thing to watch for is, how soon that water disappears.
I have no sense of how quickly the ground here is going to dry up, once we get a few consecutive days without new moisture falling. I hope to find out soon enough. With luck, we can spend a little time down by the labyrinth this weekend, doing some more design work. Walking around near the spots where the soil has been turned up (left from last fall’s roots and brush removal in the areas of previous fence lines) will tell us very quickly if the ground is still muddy.
Yesterday, we committed to the purchase of a geothermal heating and cooling system, to replace the old, existing furnace and air conditioner, so it appears the ground around here will continue to be in a state of disturbance in the months ahead. We are challenged with trying to get some pasture grass planted in a few key locations, so our hope is to get the essential excavating projects completed in time to hit the ideal growing season.
We have a lot of activities to choreograph now that we are snow free, not the least of which involves being on our deck, soaking up the warm sunshine, and watching the forest finally burst forth with leaves of green.
Relative Something 