Posts Tagged ‘family’
Quarterly Meeting
We’re trying to run a business here. Sort of. Today we will be holding our first annual meeting to assess our status and document goals for the year. Here’s hoping the animals will be well-behaved and communicate their opinions clearly.
With tax documents for the previous year filling our inbox, there is an increased visibility of the paperwork and accounting that is involved with managing finances. I was reminded that our lawyer urged us to keep thorough records of meetings that reflect operation of Wintervale Ranch.
Sure. No problem. How hard is that?
We have failed thus far to follow through on even holding formal meetings, let alone properly documenting them.
With that, this morning I will blog less, and conduct business more. I’m off to a meeting in the conference room/kitchen to lay out the goals and dreams for the 2015 phase of Wintervale Ranch, LLC. Hopefully the remote transmission from staff in the paddock will be working smoothly so advice from all parties involved will be heard.
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In Between
Lately, it feels like things here at Wintervale are in a state of being between, in a variety of ways. In large part, I think it is a function of the time of year and the type of weather we have been experiencing. The big blizzard in the northeast of the US has been the main focus of weather-related news. Here, we have had very little in the way of newsworthy winter weather. I have been able to carry on with my daily activities relatively unaffected with needing to plow and shovel snow.
After that long cold spell ended, caring for the horses has gotten a lot more relaxed. They have required little in the way of care beyond their twice a day feeding sessions and some limited paddock cleaning. I can only do so much in the way of manure management when the paddocks are frozen solid.
My daily patrols with Delilah have begun to get a little too routine, so I have started looking for ways to mix things up for her. After already having switched up the route in every way imaginable, I tried letting her choose her own path through the thick interior of our woods beyond the trail, while keeping her leashed. That meant I needed to follow as she explored through trees that I could barely maneuver. I suppose it ended up being more invigorating for me that it was for her.
Yesterday, I decided to bring along a new toy of hers that Cyndie recently brought home. Delilah had quickly accomplished beheading it to rip out the stuffing and chew the plastic squeaker. I brought the colorful remains along on our walk and periodically dropped it out of her sight while she was otherwise occupied. Then I would stop her and give the command to find her toy using her nose.
This game of having her hunt down things we hide, by tracking the scent, is as much fun for us to witness as it appears to be for her to play. It has the added benefit of keeping her attention focused on our place and not on the neighboring properties that she would prefer to explore. Those wild animal smells she keeps picking up are coming from somewhere nearby, she seems to assume.
There’s something even bigger that feels in between for me. We are in our third winter on this property, and after taking on some significant projects to improve the infrastructure supporting our horses during the first two years, we have taken a pause. There are still projects to be accomplished, but they aren’t so urgent.
At the same time, we have delayed taking some essential steps toward formalizing the equine training Cyndie wants to offer, which remains an ultimate goal. Her hip problem was a big contributor to our reasons for waiting, and now we will be in a period of rehabilitation for a while.
We are in a time between the busy activity of our initial efforts, and the point of actually offering training sessions to paying clients. The fact that this is on my mind tells me a next new phase of planning is likely to happen soon.
In the mean time, it will serve me well to allow myself to accept this period of being between. I want to enjoy the everyday moments of apparent stasis. I expect to find myself missing this when things begin to thaw and days become filled with more to be done than time allows.
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Family Fun
We experienced a dose of two extremes yesterday, our first entire day of a “stay-cation,” engaging in something we had no interest in doing, but later enjoying just what we were really wishing to experience.
After a good period of recovery from her surgery, Cyndie followed up all that holiday family contact with a dose of the flu that is going around. Concerned about getting a serious infection at this point of her healing, she chose to check in with a doctor, which led to us spending much more time than we hoped at a nearby urgent care provider.
I sat for much longer than I felt comfortable in a waiting area that was a revolving door of coughing patients. Turns out it was a good thing Cyndie went in, as they confirmed her flu diagnosis, and prescribed strong meds to treat walking pneumonia. She also learned that her weight continues to drop, so we have yet to succeed in getting her muscle mass growing any measurable amount. I mentioned that the protein smoothies might need to be accompanied by more intentional exercising. Cyndie responded that she was doing exercises while enduring the long wait for the urgent care doctor.
I got her back to our stay-cation home at her parents’ house in time to snuggle under blankets for an afternoon nap. That rejuvenated her for the evening she has been longing to have. Since the family didn’t gather up at the lake like she hoped, Cyndie convinced them to come over for pizza and games in town. She got the dose of niece and nephews time for which she hoped.
We are having a wonderful time thus far, pretending we are up at the lake with her family, even though we are still in town and only an hour away from our usual home.
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Precious Memorial
The Christmas holiday brought a bundle of family events which required that we do a lot of driving. For three days in a row, we drove the over two-hour-long round trip distance, twice a day on two of those. It was all worth it, but when yesterday arrived with no agenda requiring we leave our home, the exhaustion hit and we luxuriated in the gift of staying put.
In the afterglow of the Christmas eve and Christmas day events, Friday the 26th became an additional day of precious activities with Cyndie’s family. We started in the morning by gathering at Lakewood Cemetery in Minneapolis, where we visited the graves of some of their relatives, including Cyndie’s sister, Michelle, who died at the age of 4 in 1967 as a result of leukemia.
It took some hunting to locate the grave sites, but with the benefit of the lack of snow cover, it didn’t take long to find the markers. Some flowers were laid and then a few members of the family read portions of a memorial prayer that second brother, Barry, had composed.
This is the first time the entire family has visited the graves together, which made this a particularly special occasion. Michelle’s death occurred on December 14th, so the Christmas season for Cyndie and her parents and siblings has a way of bringing with it memories of that time in 1967.
As the middle of the day approached, we headed across the city to take a tour of the new auditorium under construction at the Masonic Children’s Hospital at the University of Minnesota. The family connection to the U of M is strong, but the connection to the Children’s Hospital is especially poignant.
The Friswold family has adopted a room in memory of Michelle. We were able to visit a similar adjacent room which was vacant, to see the special features available to children and their families as a result the financial contributions.
A significant effort is made to give the kids being treated as much control over their environment as possible. A touch-screen monitor is suspended on an arm that, among other things, allows the child to remotely control the window shades and alter the color of the room lighting. Of course, I only remember those features because they are the ones our group played with while exploring the room.
To top the day off, we finished with a special private dinner event at the U of M McNamara Alumni Center 
along with the family of Fred Friswold’s frat brother from the class of ’58, Larry Laukka. The Friswold and Laukka families have been getting together regularly at Christmastime the last few years, and this year the two patriarchs took it up a notch, bringing us on campus to share the full story of their incredible persistence as the volunteers who dreamed up and pulled off the incredible accomplishment of this world-class building.
It was a spectacular way to conclude the flurry of holiday family gatherings. Cyndie’s family is very precious, indeed, and I am a lucky man to be included as one of their own.
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Snow’s Back
I’m sitting with some Guatemalan hot chocolate and fresh-baked puppy dog tails from Isles Bun & Coffee (thanks Jeff and Catherine!), preparing to have a late breakfast after an extended trip to feed the horses. It took a little extra time this morning because of the new snow that fell overnight.
It has been a while since I needed to clear snow. I’m out of practice. I’m behind schedule and chomping at the bit to get out on the Grizzly and plow, so I’ll make this short. I’ll post pictures!
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Parking Job
It looked like we had a bit of a wild party around here overnight Tuesday. Elysa and Anne had come to spend the night so they could wake up and already be here in the morning for our family Christmas-Eve-day stockings and gift exchange.
When I stepped out with Delilah for her morning walk, I was surprised that Elysa’s car wasn’t there. As my mind worked to solve the puzzle, I realized that I had seen only Elysa the night before, when she peeked into our bedroom to say hello. Did Anne just drop her off and take the car back home, I wondered? Or, did they get up super early and need to make a run to the store for something?
I walked toward their usual parking spot and noticed the tire tracks. Then I spotted the car beyond the driveway in our back yard. What the heck? Did they come in too fast and miss the landing? No. It was obvious from the markings in the snow that they had parked and stepped out of the car doors like always.
From that, I deduced the car must have moved after they parked it. The only explanation I could figure was that the parking brake wasn’t set, and whoever had driven had failed to leave the car in gear after they stopped and shut off the engine.
It made for some good-natured ribbing with Elysa all morning. She said the parking brake was on, but she knew it wasn’t pulled tight. When pulled as tight as possible, she reported, it is difficult for her to get it to release when the time comes.
It took both Julian and me pushing, but she got it turned around and back up on the pavement again before it was time to head home.
Luckily, no one beyond us and the UPS delivery driver witnessed the car in the back yard, so she shouldn’t face any more teasing over the incident. I’m not going to tell anyone about it.
A note for our friends, the Morales family in Guatemala, who visited us during this holiday time last year… notice the lack of snow in the image above? You guys picked the perfect winter last year. What a difference we are now facing. It hardly feels like winter at all.
Merry Christmas, everyone!
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Serious Challenge
I want to send a shout out to my niece, Tricia, for the wonderfully appropriate little fiendish gift she presented to me last Sunday. She said she thought of me when she saw this item, and I can understand why. It’s a puzzle. I like puzzles. Done.
Well… I’m being reminded that my skill with puzzling is stronger in the realms of jigsaws and Sudoku. I can easily consume hours toiling away at either. Physical puzzles tend to strike me in the gaps between my logic. I have fiddled with this little metal challenge for a couple of days now, and am absolutely no closer to a solution than when I started.
That’s part of the fun. If I had solved it this quick, it would have been too easy. I think she picked just the right level for me. That is, if I can someday decipher the solution. I’ll let you know in a few weeks.
I’ve never in my life succeeded in solving the Rubik’s cube puzzle. I’m okay with that. The puzzles that entertain me feel comfortable, like a cuddly soft felt blanket. The cube is more like a scratchy wool to me. Right now, this tangle of metal seems to fall somewhere between those two.
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Sibling Revelry
Despite a sloppy wintry mix of precipitation doing its best to dampen our spirits (sorry ’bout the pun), the gathering of Hays relatives was a joy and a half. As always happens to me at family gatherings of limited duration, the riches of access to siblings I grew up with is enticing, but the reality of our usual chaos leaves me wishing there was more time. It is hard to finish a story, and sometimes a single sentence, without interruption. My attention is too often wrenched away from the person I was listening to, and time flies by so fast, the hour of departure comes up way too soon.
Regardless, every moment was precious. Reconnecting after long periods of separation, with siblings who share so many tendencies and characteristics, is refreshing and invigorating. I tend to feel a kind of validation of who I am, discovering the brothers and sisters that I grew up with remain so similar in behavior and perspectives. I am among my people again.
I’m lucky that, as a family, we all get along. These are the people who inhabited Intervale Ranch with me from the day I was born until 9 years later, when our family moved out and the property was razed for development into an industrial park.
With technical assistance from my son, Julian, I was able to display a digitized version of a slide show I put together close to 30 years ago, which featured that old farm property. It provided an opportunity to exercise our memories, as we analyzed some of the images and compared recollections.
Meanwhile, there was non-stop food to be consumed, youngsters to get reacquainted with and entertained by, and horses to visit. Unfortunately, that last part with the horses was complicated by the weather conditions. They have been a little jumpy the last two days. I’m thinking there may have been some coyote activity in the area. That jumpiness was then compounded by wet precipitation which brought them to shivers.
As the bulk of our visitors wandered down to greet the herd, the attention suddenly needed to be redirected to preparing the stalls and moving the cold, wet horses inside. At least people were able to witness the process as it happened, and see the horses enjoy the reward of coming in to warm up and dry out.
Delilah was pretty excited to have so many visitors, but eventually adjusted to the clamor of all the conversations and quietly laid in front of the fireplace. She seemed more than happy to accept cuddles from Reese, one of the older grandchildren present.
It’s nice to see the kids doing well with our animals, because we see them as potential ranch hands in the years ahead. When their parents eventually start thinking about sending them off to some camp for the summer, we can put in a pitch for the valuable experience they could gain here, doing chores at Wintervale. Seems like a win-win.
Cyndie and I express our extreme appreciation to all the family members who made the trip through messy weather to bring our place to life with their love and energy. Here’s hoping we don’t let too much time pass before the next Hays family gathering materializes!
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Family Gathering
It’s that time of year. The holiday events have started for us in earnest. Today we are hosting a large number of folks from the Hays clan, some who have never been here before. We are excited for this day and working diligently to prepare.
Therefore, my time to write is nonexistent. I’ve got chores to finish. Enjoy this photo from last year and imagine how much fun we will be having today with relatives from afar bringing Wintervale to life with their precious family energies.
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In-Law Jackpot
It was at Christmastime about 34 years ago that I embarked on the first steps of a journey that has proved to be more remarkable than I dreamed would be possible for me. I won the in-law lottery. I hit the jackpot. I will never comprehend what it was like for Cyndie’s parents to deal with the fact that I had asked for permission to marry their daughter —their first-born child, for heaven’s sake— but for me it was just a mind-numbing step in my magical journey of life.
Sometimes when I think back on it, I feel astounded that they said yes. I owe Fred and Marie Friswold more appreciation than I have been able to convey. How can I adequately express what it has meant to me to be accepted into their family? The immensity of my gratitude is beyond what I have ever thought to speak.
From that very day when I asked for their blessing to take Cyndie’s hand in marriage —when Marie’s first response came out as shock that I was asking her while she was in the middle of untangling Christmas lights— I have fallen short of telling them what they have deserved to hear.
Once again, I resort to writing. It is my preferred means. I figured maybe I would get a Christmas card for them and write a heart-felt note. Thinking about what I should write, I realized it would probably need to be a letter. That quickly led to this: a blog post. Even though they are humble enough to likely favor I had stuck with the card idea, I would like to profess my appreciation for them to the world.
It’s not like the years have been without turmoil. I am embarrassed for the number of times I failed to mask my preference to be back among the Hays way of doing things when in the midst of all things Friswold. It has always turned out to be a small price to pay. For the most part, I have been blessed with the opportunity to bask in the greatness that Fred and Marie create. Their generosity and patience is immeasurable. They have taken me to places I never thought possible, and provide never-ending support to me, Cyndie’s and my marriage, and to our children. Their acceptance and support of me is a precious gift I treasure more than any other.
Christmas is a particularly special time when their saintliness shines. They care for others with boundless benevolence. I always receive from them more than what I feel I deserve, but that is not how they measure their giving.
Fred and Marie have succeeded in the art of family where so many others have failed. It is a wonder to behold and an amazing thing to experience first hand, as their son-in-law. I owe them credit for more than I can grasp about who I am and what I have experienced.
Either written or spoken, what they mean to me really is greater than words. If you are reading this, I hope you have a sense of how blessed I feel and an inkling of the grandiosity of jackpot with which I have been blessed. I hope Fred and Marie will sense that I am more grateful to them than I ever have been, or ever will be able to say.
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Relative Something 