So Tired
Mentally weary and physically tired from the persistent pressure of daily rallying to convey our objections to ICE operations in Minnesota and to support friends and family in the vicinity of the attacks. This has been happening while we are simultaneously coping with the added stress of caring for our animals during the last few days of frigid temperatures.
A full night’s sleep is hampered by the lingering grief of citizens being murdered by our own government agents. We sleep because we are exhausted, but it is fitful sleep because we are in a battle for our constitutional rights.
We kept a fire burning in the fireplace yesterday, more for the mental and visual comfort it offered than for the added warmth it gave off.
During the afternoon, I cleaned snow remnants off the driveway that I’ve been ignoring since the last two dustings days ago. I barely had the energy reserves to finish what I started.
The horses seemed very distracted during the morning feeding, staring at length to the south. Eventually, I saw an electric power company utility truck pull into the neighbor’s complex of two houses and multiple outbuildings. Were the horses privy to an issue over there before the line workers even showed up? I was oblivious to whatever they were so curious about.
We haven’t suffered any power interruptions as a result of the Arctic cold. Well, not electric power, anyway.
I’m operating on my reserve tank, hoping for some morsel of good news to counter the endless doom and gloom being orchestrated out of the White House. It can be a battle for those of us who work every day to conquer depression when depressing reports of depressing actions become the order of the day.
Thank goodness for my music library and the ‘random play’ feature that offers a healthy distraction and moments of respite from harsh reality. My digitized record collection sends me love that feeds my soul. I don’t even care if it’s some form of AI algorithm behind the magic.
I know I’m too tired when I can’t be bothered to skip selections it picks that miss the mark.
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Fatal Cosplay
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Military madness
was killing my country
solitary sadness
comes over me
“Military Madness” by Graham Nash, from the album “Songs for Beginners” 1971
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pretend soldiers
besmirching the reputation
of actual trained personnel
killing for sport
clueless about virtue
pawns of billionaires
warping reality
destroying law and order
ripping the life from people who care
cosplay wannabees
sick with infantile understanding
devoid of what matters most
puppets on despicable strings
flailing their emasculated control
at those who know better
who gives their order?
makes them throw smoke?
pull out their weapons
with hapless impunity
rendering despair
at their vile commander’s charge
heaping hypocrisy
on a pro-life mountain
mutilated morals
of indefensible times
what matters most
both a statement and question
oh where are the ghosts
of past, present, future
to rattle their chains
unwind the destruction
rewire the circuits
of basic humanity
reclaim some dignity
restore world order
life and liberty
freedom to be
noble communities
in love with real peace
highest ideals
protecting the weak
shoulders to the wheel
of learning how to feel
healing
not hurting
not playing along
to hide rich men’s crimes
cutting the strings
of evil task masters
make them pay
for their actions
put them on the front lines
stand up for real people
take off those damn masks
go home
sit down in the corner
now look what you’ve done
Chilly Bones
We have survived our second night in a row with temperatures reaching – 20°(F) outside, where wildlife and domestic livestock live and cope with whatever Mother Nature dishes out.
Despite how extremely frosty-looking Swings was this morning, the horses are faring impressively well against the elements. None of the other three was covered with as much frost as Swings, but they all had frozen eyelashes and ice in their noses.
It is damn cold. This far below zero is where tree trunks start splitting open. It sounds like a rifle shot when they do. We have been hearing it happen, but have yet to spot clear evidence of which trees have ruptured. Air this cold is also dry and thin. Sound waves travel to the degree that vehicle tires on the pavement a mile away sound like they are right next door, similar to the way voices carry across the surface of a lake.
Boots on snow squeak like a bearing needing lubricant.
It is startling to imagine that such brutal weather as this didn’t sway a sea of tens of thousands of concerned citizens from amassing on the streets of Minneapolis yesterday to voice their objections to the abuses being dished out by the fascist regime currently sh**ting all over our democracy.
Is there any possibility that the level of dissatisfaction it takes to drive this behavior will sink in with the powers that be? If not, I shudder to think what it will take.
We decided to try giving Mia the added protection of a neck covering, but the attachment that Cyndie found in the barn wasn’t a match for the blankets we have. Maddy, from This Old Horse, stopped by with another blanket for Mia that worked a little better.
It’s funny to think that it will be twenty degrees warmer in a day or two, and even though it will still be near zero, it will feel so much less stressful for the animals. It’s all relative!
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Mia Active
On a mid-morning visit to the horses during a very picturesque cloudburst of snow yesterday, I noticed Mia standing alone by the wood fence of the large paddock while the other three were up under the overhang. I decided to talk to her, calling from uphill where I was standing, inviting her and encouraging her to come up out of the snow and be with us.
She was standing with her butt towards us, but turned her head for a second to look my direction as I talked. When I turned around, Light was coming straight toward me, and I bent down to greet her, nose to nose. She paused politely for a moment, but then continued around me and went right down to stand with Mia.
Nice. While I was trying to get Mia to come to us, Light decided to meet her where she was. Works for me. I just feel bad seeing Mia looking so alone.
Next thing I know, Light is coming back, and Mia is with her! My heart swelled. I quickly grabbed some treats to show my appreciation to both of them. I took advantage of the opportunity to offer Mia a mid-day snack of Senior Feed, something the Nutritionist had suggested as an option for Mia.
I held the bucket and let Light sneak a couple of bites, too. I was enjoying seeing them being so friendly with each other.
Shortly after that rewarding interaction, Asher and I were on a walk on the far side of the back pasture, and I noticed Mia and Light walking out into the field and coming in our direction. I stopped and acknowledged Mia, thinking she might be coming all the way to be near us.
Suddenly, Light turned and bolted back to the barn, as if having been startled by something. I felt bad that it left Mia alone, but she only remained there for a second before turning and sprinting back as well. I don’t know what bothered them, but I took pleasure in seeing Mia run with such vigor.
She may not be feeling her best, but she’s certainly showing plenty of healthy signs of life.
Before Asher and I had walked much farther, I spotted both horses meandering back out into that field a second time, leaving me curious about what it was that had spooked each one, just seconds apart from each other, but happy they felt safe enough to try again.
The weather forecast includes warnings about a severe cold wave coming with temperatures lower than we’ve seen in seven years. That means colder than these horses have experienced since they’ve lived with us.
At least they are sheltered from the wind. We are crossing our fingers that we get through the Arctic conditions without any incidents for the animals or equipment.
Baby, it’s gonna get cold outside!
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Magical Thinking
The horses appeared to be unfazed yesterday morning by the Arctic conditions that have been visiting us this week. I thought the magical sun dogs were a nice touch.
A beautiful visual to remind us how cold it is, in case we forget. I didn’t forget. The combination of my breath freezing on my mustache and a persistent runny nose serves as a constant reminder.
I didn’t do a very good job of keeping my mind clear of concerns about our national chaos when I was tending to the horses, but I managed to flip it around a little bit. Don’t know if they picked up on it or not.
Without coming to an inspiring conclusion, I decided to try a mental exercise of searching for a scenario that would somehow end the sickening slide to the destruction of our democracy we are suffering. Call it magical thinking.
Is there something that could influence the people who have the authority to end the corruption to come to their senses and act in the country’s interests?
Are there economic sanctions that could be enacted by other countries to interrupt the cash flow to the profiteers fleecing anything that can be fleeced? Is there an unnoticed hero-in-the-making in the ranks of the justice system who will show up with some key piece of irrefutable evidence that will allow every guilty associate of the mob running the scheme of the puppet master (somebody owns tRump) to be stopped in their tracks and held to account?
Is there a morning when we will wake up to discover our long national nightmare is over? Most importantly for me, will it happen in my lifetime? And which actor will play me in the movie?
For those of you who enjoy the phenomenon of snow sublimation as much as I do, I decided to scrape off the inch-plus of accumulated snow on the driveway near the house in the morning. When I saw how much cleaner the asphalt was by the afternoon, I decided to clear a little more.
No melting occurs at our below-zero (F) temperatures, but the pavement dries right up.
It’s like magic!
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Order Restored
What a difference a new weather system makes. The travesty of rain-ravaged snow cover and meltwater flowing in the ditches has ended for now, replaced by frigid temperatures and two days of tiny, flying flakes of snow.
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Order has been restored as far as winter conditions are concerned. Order has also been restored regarding the rabbit population around here. After a few years of seeing very little evidence of the busy little bunnies, it appears they have succeeded in recovering their numbers.
The residual spilled senior feed around the horses’ placemats seems to be a real attraction for them. There is a rabbit super-highway from brush piles in the trees to the corner of the barn overhang.
On a walk yesterday afternoon, Asher and I came upon Light and Mia foraging together along the fenceline of the large paddock. I was happy to see Mia looking engaged and hanging out with Light. As I was spending time visiting with them, my presence attracted Mix’s attention. Soon, all four horses made their way past where I was standing into the back pasture, where Light hooked up with Swings to do a little frisky trotting around together, and Mix stayed back with Mia.
Upon our return from a stroll around the north loop, Asher and I found all four horses had moved out to the hay field and were congregated near the fence. It looked like order had been restored among the herd. Almost.
Poor Mia still wasn’t looking like she was feeling very inspired about life. I was really pleased to see her connecting with the other three again, but the energy she was displaying did not end my concern that she’s not feeling her absolute best.
The extreme cold bearing down on us won’t be a pleasant situation for her to endure if she’s at a low ebb.
Cyndie is away for a few days, so it will be up to Asher and me to make sure we are giving Mia extra attention, making plenty of hay easily accessible for her under the overhang. When it gets really cold, we toss out loose flakes of baled hay that they don’t need to work through a hay net to eat.
Hopefully, my energy isn’t dragging Mia down. Her sad appearance presents an opportunity for me to compartmentalize my gloom over the ongoing threats to residents in Minnesota from Federal ICE agents (and now, potentially, military troops) so it won’t bleed over to the horses. They deserve to have me show up with a clear head and peaceful, loving energy in their presence.
If I can find a way to achieve that, it will be beneficial for all of us.
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Gut Feeling
Not being inclined toward appearing alarmist, I hesitate to leap to extreme conclusions; however, there is a saying that I believe came from our government… If you see something, say something. Who am I supposed to tell when I see that it’s my country that is abusing its power?
I don’t know how we can ever apologize enough to the rest of the world for the ridiculous situation we have allowed to occur.
This morning, I am also struggling with making the wrong conclusion about the way Mia was behaving. I’m not confident in my ability to trust the accuracy of my intuitive sense of feelings triggered by what I witnessed. Since nothing I saw indicates an obvious problem or a need for immediate action, we are not doing anything more than planning to keep a closer eye on her for a while.
When I described my thoughts to Cyndie after returning to the house, she admitted having had a momentary similar thought. Could Mia be sensing her life coming to its end?
Unfortunately, our weather is expected to become more stressfully cold for a period of days, so if Mia is not interested in putting in the effort to cope, a fatal result would not be a surprise. One of the things Cyndie and I talked about triggered an insight. Mia has always been the lowest in the herd order and appears ostracized all too often. Cyndie posited the possibility that these horses are not behaving in the natural ways of a healthy herd with fully intact horse senses.
Before the abuse of severe neglect they suffered, they were forced to race in competitions against other horses. Our offerings of love and comfort since they’ve been with us haven’t necessarily undone all of the compensating behaviors they adopted to deal with all the different situations they have lived through.
I felt like Mia was showing signs of not caring about staying with the other three this morning. It could have been a passing grudge that won’t endure, and we will soon find her reengaged with one or more of the others.
Whether it’s my country or our horses, I find myself experiencing an unpleasant gut feeling.
It would be just fine with me to be wrong about Mia.
As for the country, I’m afraid things have already gone further than should ever have been allowed.
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Actually Happening
Our politicians, all of them, have failed all of us by not holding each other accountable to the oaths of office they took to carry out the duties outlined in the U.S. Constitution. Unfortunately, bad people will take advantage of opportunities to do wrong when they get the chance. Groups of bad people playing a long game appear to have figured out a strategy to get around the guidelines of ethical behavior that our democracy assumed would govern the intended protections of having three separate branches of power.
One might surmise that money is the root cause of the mess we now find ourselves in under the current suspiciously elected administration, taking overt steps to achieve a fascist and highly profitable control of this country.
There was a time when a multitude of the actions currently playing out in plain sight would have led to arrest. Behaviors that once resulted in universal condemnation started being overlooked until it now seems as though no level of shameful words or actions will result in rational consequences.
It doesn’t paint a pretty picture.
To counter that, I offer a few pretty pictures I’ve taken and a thrilling distraction depicting an example that not everyone gives in to the lure of money over ethics or laws.
First, the distraction: Cyndie and I enjoyed the latest movie with Matt Damon and Ben Affleck together again, “The Rip,” for its crafty hold on maintaining an enduring tension throughout (it’s a crime thriller!), the great performances of all the actors, and the intelligent script. Pay attention and keep up. For added depth to this cinematic adventure, it is based on a real-life police raid in Miami. If you are up for a break from the tension of today’s news, this movie will let you vent some of that energy in the safe confines of home (it’s on Netflix) and get you to a rewarding (pun acknowledged) resolution after just 2 hours and 13 minutes. Don’t hold your breath the whole time.
Looking down, here is one scene from the start of falling snow yesterday, and two from this morning:
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