Relative Something

*this* John W. Hays' take on things and experiences

Archive for February 27th, 2014

Pee Happens

with 4 comments

IMG_3486eI have grown to really appreciate my quilt-lined Carhartt bib overalls this winter. They hang at the front door and no matter what I am wearing, I can hop into them to head down to the barn for chores. When I walk in the door in the afternoon, dressed from the day-job, stepping into these overalls covers perfectly for mucking out the barn and feeding the horses.

I ran into one problem with them the other day though, when I discovered the zipper in the fly is jammed and won’t open. I don’t recall if I have broached this subject in the blog already, or not, but since moving to the country, I have peed outside more than ever before. I can pretty confidently report that I never had occasion to pee outside when we were living on a tiny lot in the suburbs.

I suppose it seems acceptable, logical even, to take breaks outside to “water the trees” when exposed (hee hee, I wrote “exposed”) to Delilah and the horses doing it so often. Maybe something in me senses the value of marking my territory.

On Monday, when I was on the diesel tractor trying to finish clearing snow from the driveway and front of the barn, I got the sense my bladder was filling, but I wanted to complete the plowing before taking a break. That was a bad decision.

Of course, the worse the urge got, the closer I would be to almost finishing. If you know me at all, you can imagine me deciding to try to get just a little more snow removed, and then cleaning up one remaining edge. One of the difficulties I have plowing with our machines is that almost every time I move snow from one spot, I spill it on another. I kept not being done yet. I guess for some reason, I decided to torture myself by not pausing and climbing down to pee. I waited so long it was getting painful, which I know better than to do. Why in the world…?

Now imagine how calm, collected, and thorough I was about getting the tractor parked in the garage. It’s a miracle I didn’t crash into something as I rushed to get it put away. Happily, I wasn’t wearing the bib overalls at the time, and I didn’t need to make my way up to the house.

With that incident fresh in mind, my discovery that the overalls zipper was jammed took on greater significance. I intend to correct that situation well before the next time I might have need to use it.

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Written by johnwhays

February 27, 2014 at 7:00 am