Relative Something

I am plum beat. Late blog post this a.m. because I went out to feed the horses in a spectacularly beautiful snowstorm and ended up wrestling with gutter and ice problems that I had let accumulate on the drain side of the barn. I was able to easily knock down the drifts and ice buildup on the edge overhanging the gutter that runs across the shelter area for the horses, but the tub we had placed under the downspout on that melty day last week had turned into a pending disaster. Oops, I forgot about it.

There went a couple good hours, donated to draining my strength at a time when there is about two days of plowing and snow clearing facing me. Then it will be back to work full-time next week to cover for my vacationing assistant. It would be a fine time to practice living in the moment, but I am finding myself repeatedly working on mentally psyching myself up for the coming effort.

Sad, because I know better. Alas, I put myself through double the work by focusing on it before it gets here, and then also when I am actually involved in it. Funny how that works.

I think it is related to already being drained by the day I spent getting Cyndie to her surgery and back, and then mentally trying to stay ahead of her trying to do things while she is supposed to lay down and rest. I failed to get the vacuuming done in time and she was ensconced in that chore plus some laundry by the time I got back to the house this morning.

No wonder I’m tired.

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