Relative Something

Number of mosquitoes swatted in the house last night: 6
Mosquito count outside the house lately: Googolplex
Seconds until hoards of mosquitoes descend on my exposed flesh in the garage: 6
Amount of bug repellent I like putting on my skin: 0
Amount of day being worked today: 1/2
Hours to be driven out of town: 3
Number of mosquitoes waiting for me up north: nevermind
Related families uniting for the weekend: 9
Family reunions so far this summer: 2
The unqualified answer to anything: six
Number of kids who know what that’s all about: 2
What that has to do with anything right now: nothing
Number of ideas I had when I decided to create this list: 0
Number of times numbers have been repeated in the answers above: 3
Significance of that: come on, it’s a numbers list!
Number of times the State Fair was brought up at work yesterday: way too many
Calories in an order of cheese curds at the fair: 1,140
Miles of walking the fair grounds required to burn that many calories: 11.5
How much less that makes me lust for fried cheese curds: zilch, zippo, hardly at all
How fond mosquitoes are of fried cheese curds: now that’s just plain silly